She'll be here soon...

So, I just had my last OB appointment before my sweet girl, Riley, joins our family. My doctor actually listened to me today. He wanted to have me come in Tuesday night to start my induction, but he let me schedule it for Sunday night instead. YAY!!

I called my hubby as I left the appointment, and I could tell it freaked him out a bit. If I'm being honest, it freaks me out a little too. We've known that Riley would be here soon, but now the soon is literally just around the corner!!

I am concerned for the whole labor thing. I know my girl is going to be large, and large and labor are two words that don't bring a smile to my face. My doctor doesn't seem to think a c-section will be necessary, but who knows what will happen. I think the unknown part of it is what scares me the most!

So, I have four more days before we check into the hospital. I know I'll be thinking about Madeline while I'm there. It will be hard not to see her and know what's going on. I can't wait until the moment she gets to come to the hospital and meet her baby sister for the first time. That will be SO special, and I can only hope it's an experience she'll be able to remember.

I feel like there should be millions of things I need to do before Sunday, but I don't know what they are. Maybe I should sit down and start working on my to-do list. I'm such a list maker!!

I don't know what should go on my list, I don't know what the next several days will have in store for me, I don't know what to expect. There is really only one thing I do know; she'll be here soon...

I'm Back...for now

Is anyone out there still checking this blog? I highly doubt it, and I wouldn't blame you a bit! I've been gone 9 whole months!! WOW! I've been gone from my blog almost as long as I've been pregnant...and that feels like a WHOLE LOTTA TIME!!

Things have changed a bit since I was last blogging. First and foremost, our little family of three will soon (but not soon enough) be a little bigger family of four!! Riley Abagail should make her appearance in a week-ish. If I have my way, she'll be here by this time next week. I'm pretty sure my uncooperative OB won't agree. However, she'll be here soon.

I am SO ready for her to come. Yes, I'm uncomfortable. I can't sleep. My stomach seems to get bigger with each passing day. However, it's so much more than that. I can't wait to see what she will look like. Will she have hair? What color will her eyes be? How will she feel while I'm holding her in my arms.

I know I'm not a first time mom, but I sure feel like one. Madeline will be five soon, and I have forgotten SO much of what the first year or two were all about. She is just so independent these days that I forget she once depended on us for everything! I just keep hoping that taking care of an infant is like riding a bike...not that I've done that for a really long time either!

I hope to be better about blogging in the next few months. I know things will be busy, but this will be a great way to keep everyone updated on our progress. It will be a good way to share pictures of our family as we handle the joys of growing.

So, friend, pardon my absence. I'm back. I'd like to say I'm back for good, but I know myself too well to pressure myself into a long-term blogging commitment. What I can say is that I'm back...for now. :)

Happy New Year...Now who wants a RAK?!

It is now officially 2008! It has been for quite some time, but this is the first time I thought to post well wishes to you all!

I hope all of my friends and family have a blessed, happy, and healthy year!!

Here are my 2008 Goals (I refuse to call them resolutions) :)

More...
*smiling
*scrapping
*playing
*exercising
*reading
*laughing
*enjoying

Less...
*complaining
*spending
*tv watching
*worrying
*eating

What about you? What is one thing you'd like to do more of in 2008? How about less? I will send a RAK to a randomly chosen response at the end of January.

In Mourning...

I have started my day of mourning. I have these at least 3 times a year...the beginning of August, late March, and early January. I'm wearing mostly black to be true to the feelings I have. I am feeling down in the dumps, blue, grouchy.

I start out my day of mourning being in denial. Not long after I enter the anger phase...and this lasts most of the day. Finally, by the time I set the alarm and pull back the covers, I enter resignation. I realize there is nothing I can do to change the situation.

What am I mourning, you may ask? I am mourning the end of my vacation. :) I am pathetic about not wanting school to start back again. I so enjoy being at home, calling my own shots each and every day. I can be lazy, refuse to put on make-up, let my hair be au-natural. Not come tomorrow. Tomorrow I am back to the grind...whether I want to be or not.

Don't get me wrong...I don't dislike my job. I actually like what I do, and I enjoy the people I work with. It's just not nearly as enjoyable as being at home spending time with Jase and Madeline...nothing beats that.

I'll be fine in the morning, I know I will. It will be a struggle to get out of bed...of that I am sure! But, I'll make it. I'll have a fine day catching up with the teachers, leading a few sessions of our inservice, sharing a few laughs. Things will be fine on the outside...but on the inside, I'll be working through my grief...in what stage, I don't yet know. I'll be bright and cheery to others, but inside, I'll still be wearing black. :)

5 Things for Which I'm Thankful Right Now (in no particular order)...

1. Vacation Days
2. Having a job
3. My family and friends
4. Working in a job that I enjoy
5. The fact that no matter how much you are grieving, at some point, it comes to an end. :)

Nichols...OUT!